14 March 2007

In Which I Get All Calvinist Wit' It

Little Green Footballs is a family place (er, depending on the time of day, and the temperature of the topic...), and we were discussing various traditions among the membership. Over there we have Catholics, Protestants, Jews, Ba'Hai, Mormons, Buddhists (I think), and so on. A sense of humor is a pre-requisite.

I may be agnostic (or I may not, heh), but I come from the Protestant tradition. These are my traditions:

  • Don't laugh--that's not funny.
  • Please be quiet, I'm thinking.
  • What's that on your face? Ewww, it's food.
  • Use your fork, not your fingers.
  • Say "Hell" if you want, and "Damn" if you must, but "have got" will get your mouth washed out with soap.
  • Don't scuff your heels on the ground--walk like a human.
  • My religion actually does allow me to dance--but you won't catch me out there jerking like an electrician having a bad day at work.
  • Tennis shoes are for tennis. Running shoes are for running. Athletic shoes are not to be worn except in the actual conduct of exercise.
  • If you must suffer, do it quietly.

Your Mileage May Vary.

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